Giveaway: When gnomes attack!

Garden gnomes. So charming. So whimsical. So innocent.

That’s exactly what they want you to think.

The diminutive dudes are dangerous, says author Chuck Sambuchino. Yet we invite them into our yards — which are conveniently close to our doors. A little too close. Sambuchino has written the definitive guide to fighting back against the cheery little lawn goblins:

How To Survive A Garden Gno1 198x300 Giveaway: When gnomes attack!

The gnomes hate our freedom. They’ll do anything it takes to bring us to our knees. At which point we’d still be a lot taller than they are, but slightly more vulnerable, I suppose. Would you take that chance with your loved ones?

Only vigilance can thwart a such an attack. Should the yard ornaments rise up, a source of quick energy will be needed. That’s why I’m pairing the book with a sweet and creamy adrenaline substitute:

DSCF42891 300x225 Giveaway: When gnomes attack!

Don't flee gnomes without it.

This 3.5-oz. dark chocolate bar, from Bloomsberry & Co. of New Zealand, is designed “for immediate relief of chocolate cravings, lovesickness, exam pressure, mild anxiety and extreme hunger.” Just the thing for a gnome attack, too. (Or you could set it aside for a Valentine’s Day gift.)

To enter:

If you do any (or all!) of these things, please leave additional comments to get credit for each entry.

The deadline is 9 p.m. PST on Monday, Jan. 31.

Enter now. Otherwise the gnomes win.


83 Comments

  1. MaryLambert

    How did you know I’m an absolute FREAK for Garden Gnomes?! ….and chocolate of course!

  2. at least you didn’t offer a little tiny bar to attract the gnomes’ attention, instead of ours!
    (And maybe the gnomes will go after Martha Stewart, instead. Her ex-husband Andy was the one to unleash them on the publishing world.)

  3. and yes, I’m subscribed…

  4. Debbie Chioffe

    Everything goes with Chocolate..especially a great Read! Please include me in your drawing, I would love to win this fun and unusual book and the chocolate is a nice bonus. Please include me in your drawing. Thank-you Donna.

  5. Debbie Chioffe

    ….Yes, I am also subscribed by email and on facebook.

  6. Mollymouser

    I love gnomes

  7. Oh, how I love, love, love garden gnomes…I only regret their more sinister side. :-)

  8. Love your giveaways and especially when they include chocolate.

  9. lostAnnfound

    I subscribe via RSS. Thanks!

  10. Cynthia McClure

    Love those gnomes!

  11. I’m appreciating your sense of humor this morning. Bring on the gnomes and chocolate defense.

  12. As always, keeping up with you and your daughter’s “I Pick up Pennies.”

  13. noooooooooo, bad gonomes, no chocolate, chocolate for meeee
    hehehe, i kept up with you with facebook. talk to you later

  14. They have evil twins everywhere ! : )

  15. Elizabeth

    Cute!

  16. Elizabeth

    I subscribe via email.

  17. I need the emergency chocolate this morning, hang the gnomes, let’s talk about work attacks!

  18. April Burger

    I have a friend who LOVES the Gnomes .. this would make an excellent birthday present!

    Follow by email

  19. April Burger

    And who doesn’t love chocolate???

    And on Facebook!

  20. A gnome resides in our garden. Every time we find him we try to hid him behind something but somehow he peeks out. Frankly I find it embarrasing. Please include me in the giveaway.

    Darla – subscribing right now.

  21. ImJuniperNow

    As someone who endured years of “David the Gnome” on Nickelodeon, I believe I deserve this prize more than anyone. It might make the bad dreams go away (or at least soften them). And the chocolate? Well, I AM a woman…….

  22. Katherine

    I ssubscribe via RSS

    And I love chocolate. :)

  23. What a hilsrious looking bok!! I’ve always loved the whole mystery ehind garden gonmes!!! Going to look this up on amazon right now.

  24. I also get your emails!

  25. I always suspected that those nasty little gnomes were plotting something!

  26. I’m still here and I subscribe via e-mail.

  27. And I’m a facebook stalker!

  28. The gnome knows…….

  29. Facebook too.

  30. I love Gnomes…and chocolate! Thanks!
    jackievillano at gmail dot com

  31. I subscribe via email
    jackievillano at gmail dot com

  32. I love gnomes, I love chocolate and I love Chuck– Sign me up!

  33. Veronica Adrover

    I subscribe via RSS

  34. Veronica Adrover

    And I LOVE chocolate ;-]

  35. Wow would love to win

  36. rss subscriber

  37. Michelle

    Won’t the chocolate attract the gnomes? Hmmm…

  38. Michelle

    Also subscribe via Google Reader. Cheers!

  39. OMG, my sister loves garden gnomes and has several. If I win, I’ll have to have you ship it to her!!!

  40. I love chocolate and gnomes!

  41. It’s good to be warned about the Attack of the Gnomes instead of wasting my time worrying about the zombie apocalypse. Chocolate will provide the energy needed to be alert to impending gnome incursions!

    And I subscribe via email. Thanks for your blogs!

  42. Chocolate cures just about everything. :-)

  43. I follow on Twitter.

  44. I get your emails.

  45. The perfect Valentine’s Day gift. Thank you for the giveaway!

  46. I LOVE your give-aways, especially when they involve chocolate….

  47. Perfect! I dread gnomes and love chocolate!

  48. And I subscribe by email.

  49. I would love to read this book! If I don’t win, I’m going to get it anyway.

  50. I used to have a book about Gnomes. It was so wonderfully illustrated. I didn’t know they could be a danger to us. I want that candy, Donna!

  51. Alicia Caldwell

    I have heard so much about this book and would absolutely love to win a copy.

    I subscribed by email and am a twitter follower.

  52. Thanks for alerting me to the danger. I hope my yard is not invaded by these little rascals. Maybe my three little red hens will warn me. Sign me up for the book and chocolate. Thanks.

  53. Donna~
    About a week after your ankle incident, I fell and broke my ankle. I want you to know the only reason I went to the hospital was after reading what happened to you, and I thought… hmmm….maybe I should have my ankle checked out…
    So as i sit here in my aircast, it would be nice to read a book and partake some chocolate, while reading your website…….

    • Donna Freedman

      @Rusty: Ouch. At least mine was only a sprain! I hope yours feels better soon.

  54. Me and my ankle are facebook fans too…

  55. Emergency chocolate!! Awesome.

  56. I’m a twitter follower. Take that, gnomes!

  57. i’m an RSS follower, too. Gnomes lose!

  58. Jersey Babs

    OMG! I just sent my best friend since 7th grade (and that was quite a while ago) a garden gnome christmas ornament. What kind of friend am I? What have I done?!! Perhaps I’ll win this book and avert disaster!

    • Donna Freedman

      @Jersey Babs: The next time you call your friend and someone with a squeaky li’l voice and an evil, high-pitched cackle answers the phone…Well, I just hope you can sleep at night.

  59. average joe

    gnomes?

  60. domestic diva

    Not sure about gnomes, but emergency chocolate is always good.

  61. Patricia

    As a gardener I’d better read this book. Thanks for the contest

  62. Patricia

    I’m an RSS feed user too.

  63. Tammy Archambeau

    I would love to have a copy of “How to Survive A Garden Gnome Attack.” ;-)

  64. Sherry H

    I wasn’t going to enter, but the gnomes made me do it! (Well, that and the thought of chocolate…)

    Thanks for the opportunity!

  65. Kathy Joy

    I finally found you again! I loved your messages on MSN, but couldn’t find you. I have subscribed. I would love your book and the chocolate, too! LOL You have inspired me!!!

  66. Hehe, this book sounds hilarious. I hope its as good as The Zombie Survival Guide.

  67. This will go nicely next to my copy of “Gnomes!”

  68. So I was so excited that i subscribed to the rss feed, followed on twitter, and I’m leaving this comment! Hooray for creepy lawn ornaments lol

  69. Christine D.

    There are some suspicious looking gnomes in the neighborhood – Hopefully, if I win the book I can protect the homestead.

  70. Christine D.

    I follow you on Facebook, too.

  71. Jennifer

    I sure do love chocolate!

  72. Jennifer

    I follow you on Twitter!

  73. Jennifer

    Subscribed through RSS!

  74. Signing up. Need to read about gnomes!
    Will follow!

  75. I look forward to winning and reviewing this book because frankly I’ve been suspicious of those creatures since they started taking jobs away from humans in the travel web site spokesman field.

  76. I subscribed via e-mail.

  77. I signed up to follow Surviving and Thriving on Twitter.

  78. This could really help me overcome my fear of garden gnomes. Fingers crossed!

  79. And here I thought I was JerseyBabs’s BFF! She also sent my husband some little robot ornaments for Christmas. And we all know *they* are planning world domination! Are the gnomes and the robots in cahoots?!?! Have they already taken over NJ and are forcing innocent people to spread their gnomish plague?!? (I offer as evidence the TV show “Jersey Shore” which could only have come from dwarfishly evil minds) I may need a lot of chocolate and a very good survival manual to get through all this! Or maybe just a bigger hammer…………….

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Tweets that mention Giveaway: When gnomes attack! -- Topsy.com - [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Ben Woodard, My Little Secret and Chrystal Rose, Chuck Sambuchino. Chuck Sambuchino …

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>