Heading home, and planning to stay there.

I’m so tired. Madeline Kahn said it much more melodically as Lili von Schtupp in “Blazing Saddles,” but all I can do is say it outright.

I’d planned to stay in New York City (at a hostel, of course) for several days after SaveUp 2011. But I cut the trip short when I realized that I was dangerously tired.

Can’t-remember-things tired. Bumping-into-stuff tired. Tired past the point where sleep rests me. My brain feels like a glacier: cold and sluggish and with chunks calving off.

Lately I’ve felt unable to do what I consider good work on Surviving and Thriving. It’s taken everything I’ve got just to meet deadlines for the other three sites for which I write.

In fact, some days I feel like crying when I sit down at the computer. Not a good sign.

I’m burned out. I need to figure out how to rest, play and even read for fun sometimes, instead of working what feels like 24/7.

This is particularly frustrating because it’s happening just as I’m getting more opportunities: syndication on Money Talks News, staff-writer post at Get Rich Slowly and the chance to write for DailyWorth.  All are great ways to attract new readers here at Surviving and Thriving.

But if I don’t have good stuff, people who drift over to take a look won’t bother to come back. And lately I’ve been too exhausted and preoccupied to write much that’s really readable.

When your body says “Enough!”

Understand: The fatigue is largely a result of choices I’ve made. I chose to go back to school. I chose to keep the apartment-management job longer than I probably should have. I chose to travel a lot in the past two years. I chose to attend four conferences (and speak at two of them) since August.

For about six years I’ve been going at a dead run. Now my brain and my body are saying, “Stop!”

Thus I’m planning to take a couple of months off from travel. Well, as soon as I get back from my long trip to Anchorage, from the third week in November until early January. That journey was already planned, the ticket is already bought, and I’m looking forward both to Christmas with my niece and her boys and the Talkeetna Bachelors Auction and Wilderness Woman Competition.

But when I get home, I will spend at least a couple of months in Seattle. For the first time in almost two years I won’t be putting out fires preparatory to jumping on another plane. I won’t be trying to do interviews and write in challenging work conditions, or staying up until 3 a.m. writing because I spent so much time visiting relatives and friends.

I need to get my groove back. As in, “excited about writing again.” It wouldn’t hurt me to get back in the pool, either.

Readers: Ever struggled against admitting fatigue, as though it were the same as admitting defeat? How did you learn to make smarter choices?


64 Comments

  1. listen to your body. it doesn’t matter how fantastic the opportunities are if you’re not healthy enough to take advantage of them. when i get to this point, which i try to avoid, i just stop. now go rest.

  2. Donna, I attended (went back to) school from 1991 to 1997, NONSTOP, mini-terms, all weekend long courses, summer courses, sometimes only having two days between exams and returning to class. I was so mentally and physically drained, I did not have the wherewithall to take the comps for my MA in English. I dropped out for a year, got a nothing job, did not read anything, took three months for the fatigue to go away and took Interior Design classes. After over a year of not going to school, I returned and got the masters in education. I had burned out. Crashed. I had never rested. The one thing I did in 7 years that was not school or career related was to see Encino Man. I was driven and did not attend another movie. I had never read a book for fun.
    Then, I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia. Then, work or fun was exhausting. I have not told a soul until now, 20 years later because fibromyalgia looked like defeat. I suspected there was some chronic fatigue that I did not even want to tell a doctor about.

    I have few choices now because if I work beyond what I can, I stumble around and have fallen once because of some physical problems coupled with fatigue. Yes, running into doors and other things is me. If I don’t quit soon enough, I don’t even feel safe driving.

    I am sure the man auction will restore you.

  3. Carol in Philly

    Donna, puhleeze take care of yourself ( she says selfishly), as I would really miss your writings. Staying up till 3 am to finish your work? I’m no time management expert, but I suspect there’s something wrong with this picture. Maybe you need more of a scheduled existence. With plenty of time for a few movies, reading trashy novels (if that’s your pleasure), and maybe a lazy afternoon nap now and then. I’m sure you’ll figure out a way to both survive and thrive.

  4. Hi dear Donna,

    Just a few tips from a “Pro” :)

    Each and every day you need to make sure you get Rest, Relaxation and Sleep. You cannot borrow one against the other, you need all three. (And no, Rest does not equal Relaxation.)

    The best way to gain back energy when you feel you’ve been asking a lot of yourself for a while, is to give energy back: i.e. you need a bit of extra rest and to do fun stuff. All is permitted, as long as it’s not something you need to do. See funny movies, paint a picture, go to a good concert or listen to your favourite music, soak up a few sun rays in the park, read that beautifully illustrated book you never took the time for. You get the idea.

    Well, at least admitting a problem is a problem half solved.
    Take your time (it took a while to create the situation, so it will take a bit of time to heal it) and I really hope you’ll feel much better soon.

    Love your blogs, in a world trying to make us spend it’s so refreshing to get some help in staying on track and be mindful about needs and wants. Thank you!

  5. Sometimes when the mind goes into overdrive wanting to experience life at warp speed, the body is the one that has to apply the brakes..as someone with an autoimmune disorder I can only encourage you to listen to your body and obey.. If you show it some respect, it will allow you to do all the things you want..eventually :) Take a breather and find the right pace for you and before you know it.. the joy will return. One of the things that I enjoy so much about your writing is your honesty and humor. Please keep on with both! Get well, stay well please.

  6. I think I still struggle with it every so often. However, at some point my body tells me to just chill. I just don’t enjoy my family, friends, or work as much.

    I’ve built in laid back days into my schedule to give myself some breathing room. It’s only been a month, but so far it has helped.

  7. average guy

    yes, i agree with comments. take it easy, take it slow. chill out, look for calmness.
    been that frantic during school, used to got to bed with the textbooks, reading till I fell asleep with the books in my hands. overdrive overdone overkill.

    i advise:
    - minimum one bubble bath every 24 hours. no rushing. no electronic devices near tub.
    - looking at greenery. is there a forest or grove of trees near you. just sit there and look at them. if you have a stress-free garden relationship, then ok to do some of that.
    - avoid rush hours, crowded public transportation, the news, tv.
    - limit internet to a fixed time, set a kitchen timer if necessary, then log off and shut it down
    - avoid most music. maybe some classical if you like that (i do).
    - pursue silence. it is the best way to rejuvenate.

    • Donna Freedman

      @Average Guy: Classical is the only music to which I listen. I’ll keep it away from the tub. :-)

  8. I have been in your shoes! I was so burned out on reading about money that I didn’t want to deal with my money or write about money! I found that completely unplugging for a few days, spending time with family, getting things done around my house and reading some fiction made a huge difference in my outlook.

    All you can do is all you can do. And I think you’re doing a good job. Just listen to your body. Take a little break. We’ll be waiting for you!

  9. Hey Donna!

    I read your post with even more interest than usual (is that possible), because I wondered recently how you were juggling so much in such small bursts of time.

    DO follow the advice of everyone else here; relax, rewind, rejuvenate!

    DO enjoy your time in Anchorage. While you’ll be busy (woo hoo, Bachelor auction!), it’s a different type of time-mgmt/activity level.

    I think travelling for work, as opposed to family time, could be what caused you to pull the emergency break. Good for you!

    A couple of days ago, I had to acknowledge that the nagging drag I’d had for a few days prior was indeed fatigue. It’s left me petulant, just short of foot-stomping, but I slept for hours.

    My brain’s overworked & underplayed.

    Take the time to step away, as others have already said, we’ll be here when you return! But, thanks for thinkin’ of us all the same!

  10. Harry Martin

    One of my favorite essays from “Simple Abundance” was on saying “no.”

    She told of a woman who ran a mile a minute, and when she was diagnosed with breast cancer, her response was, “I finally have a reason to say no.”

    Pretty sad.

    It’s always stuck with me.

    Take care and recharge. It hits everyone.

    Hugs,
    Harry

  11. Take care Donna – it’s often far easier to ‘just keep going’ than to take a break, so I applaud you on your sound choice. :)

  12. Hootieman

    I was so involved, and spread so thin that I wound up with a lot of health problems. I had to spend every Sunday in bed for a long time. I learned to say no. I learned that I am entitled to rest, and enjoy the simple things in life.
    You are wise to realize you must take care of yourself. Learn the luxury of naps. They don’t cost you a dime but they are priceless. I take one every Sunday, and sometimes other days too.
    I hope that you take care of yourself, and are restored. I have a suggestion on a book the library might be able to get for you. It is called, “A Touch Of Wonder”. God bless you, and get well soon.
    hootie
    P.S. Row Row Row Your boat, gently down the stream. Throw your teacher overboard, and listen to her scream!

    • Donna Freedman

      @Hootieman: Yep, naps are swell. I take a few each week. They rarely last more than 40 minutes but they keep me going.
      My great-nephew thought that version of “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” was hilarious. I prefer the Mensa version:
      Propel, propel, propel your craft
      Moderately along the aqueous solution
      Ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically, ecstatically
      Existence is but an illusion.

      My friend Linda B. can sing it in Latin. I’ve got to get her to teach me that.

  13. Holly Samlan

    I don’t think the LONG trips like the planned AK one is your undoing. I think it has been the multitude of short, nearly back to back ones.

    Take time to rest & recuperate. Then watch your calendar. Limit the number of short trips (1/month?). If you do add on days to be a tourist in a particular city remember, you will probably be back in a year or 2 and you do NOT need to do everything in 2-4 add on days.

  14. Yes! On the travel. When I was on sabbatical I was literally going some place every week. A year later I was ready to start going places again.

    A person can really have too much travel. It’s ok to allocate those dollars differently. The only reason experiences are superior to stuff for most people is because they have too much stuff and not enough experiences. Sounds like you’ve been tipping the other direction! Conferences are fun but tiring… people need breaks.

    I recommend a steak or a burger (your choice) with a side salad and veg and maybe a baked sweet potato (butter and cinnamoned up) to get your strength back. Then stay at home for a few months until you feel like traveling again.

    Btw, “too much travel” would make an excellent GRS post. I bet it will get a lot of comments.

    Here’s our version: http://nicoleandmaggie.wordpress.com/2011/05/23/the-experiences-vs-stuff-post/ I bet yours would be funnier, more focused, without econ jargon, and just all around better. (At some point, JD may burn out on travel too, though it sounds like he’s not there yet.) There’s a reason that jobs with a lot of travel pay a premium rather than a lower salary.

    • Donna Freedman

      @Nicoleandmaggie: Mmmm….cinnamon and butter on sweet potatoes….
      Having spoken at two conferences, I want to do it again. But I bet conference organizers are working at least a year in advance, that will give me some breathing room to recharge. I’ll work on irresistible (I hope) pitches and send ‘em to all the conferences about writing/blogging/midlife that I can find, and see if any offers pop up. Should this happen, it won’t happen next week, or next month, and thus respite is built in.
      Thanks for your kind words, and for reading Surviving and Thriving.

  15. I think we are all exhausted. Let’s think about it, bad economy, job loses, doing more with less, paying for less, keeping up a house, dealing with relationships whether at work or home, dealing with unrealistic expectations, it all weighs you down. Take all the time you need to decompress we will still be here.

  16. You know I’ve been thinking in the last few posts that I didn’t know how you were managing to be so on the go. Not that the blog was showing strain but your life was so incredibly frenetic for the past couple months!

    I’m glad you’re recognizing it and have a plan. Travelling is hard but a LONG trip will offer some restoration as well.

    I tend to overdo – working on deciding what to cut from my own way too frenetic life at the moment – I don’t know the answer – part of it seems to be that it’s feast or famine for me – so right now I’m trying to adjust schedules so that not everything has to happen at once!

  17. Oh, Donna! I’ve been sitting here trying to think what to say, and not coming up with anything pithy or profound. I definitely know the feeling of burnout, and it isn’t pretty or fun. And our society isn’t always very supportive – telling you to make sure to make time for yourself on the one hand, and piling on more obligations with the other.

    And writing may come easily – but to sustain it, over time, is hard. Take whatever time you need to and take care of yourself. FWIW, I have found your recent writing here very readable. I had noticed you weren’t posting as often, but I don’t think the quality of what is posted has suffered.

    Hugs if you want them. Take whatever time you need to rest and rejuvenate. We’ll be here for you. And let us know if there’s anything we can do to help.

    • Donna Freedman

      @SherryH: Thanks for your kind words, and your support. Knowing that people are reading, or waiting to read, is a big help.

  18. crazyliblady

    Hi, Donna. I have been there more than once. Go for a walk once in awhile and notice what is around you. Deliberately look at birds, trees, and anything around you. It will help you take your mind off any problems. Try meditating and/or doing yoga. Both will work on your chakras (energy centers in the body) and help you feel more calm and centered. Also, create a to-do list that is prioritized so that you know what must be done and also what you would like to get done. You may be surprised at what you are able to accomplish. And don’t forget to take a day off and have fun once in awhile, but it doesn’t have to cost anything. It’s important to recharge your self once in awhile.

    • Donna Freedman

      @Crazyliblady: Oh, I have a to-do list. It’s prioritized, but it’s also as long as my leg. I enjoy crossing things off, even as more items wash in on the tide.
      I walk every day. It’s my main form of exercise, lately, and a good stress reliever. Also the only way I get groceries/run errands, since I gave my car away two years ago.
      The day-off part has been a challenge, since in order to be ready to take the next trip I’d need to get all my ducks in a row. If I cut back on trips to the airport I’ll be able to take more days off.
      Took a yoga class a few years ago through the city rec department. It’s probably time to take another one.
      Thanks for reading, and for leaving a comment.

  19. ImJuniperNow

    I don’t have to do anything – my body does it for me. I get deathly ill (something similar to the flu) and wind up wasting vacation/sick days from work not doing something better.

    We’re not getting any younger, kiddo!

    • Donna Freedman

      @ImJuniperNow: After reading your comment I realized this is how it used to work back when I was newspapering, raising a kid and freelancing all at the same time. I’d go, go, go until I collapsed with something akin to pneumonia. My physician said this was a common dynamic among many working women she knew: They’d work until they dropped, take a few days off (worrying the whole time about lost income or things that needed doing), then crawl out of bed and start over.
      Not healthy, then or now. Balance is what I’m seeking. I hope to find it, finally. Saying “no” would be a good start — and lately I’ve done that because I felt myself teetering on the edge. Once I establish some sort of equilibrium, I need to remember how to say “no” lest I get right back into the same predicament.
      Thanks for reading, and for leaving a comment.

  20. Donna, as all the others have said “rest and relax”. I will be here when you are ready to share more frugal news.

  21. jestjack

    I have from time to time “burned the candle at both ends” and become just ….”spent”. Rehabilitation of rental property can be especially physically and emotionally draining. Remember as you are pouring your hard earned cash (often TOO much) into rentals for repair or improvement…they are bring in NO income….and it takes it’s toll. I try to mix it up…some painting …maybe replace some doors….perhaps some plumbing for a bit…some flooring. BUT what I have found most rewarding is to just …take a day…perhaps run some errands, catch up on mail, follow up with clients or old friends, go to a yard sale, putter in the garage….anything BUT renovation to rentals. This tends to”recharge my batteries” and makes me more focused and driven to get the job done. Of course when all else fails….a stop at Dairy Queen is the best therapy. Ice cream always seems to make things better!

    • Donna Freedman

      @Jestjack: I’ve been burning it at both ends AND in the middle for more than six years (and for a couple of decades before that, to be honest). Just can’t keep it up and still be (a) creative and (b) happy.
      I will find what works for me. Ice cream sounds like a great tactic. :-)

  22. Rochelle in San Diego

    I “feel you” as the inmates on those awful “Lockup” shows say.

    I have been working full-time and trying desperately to re-organize my household since my son moved out in August. Here it is almost November and I am not done. There’s nobody pushing for this task to be completed except me.

    Realistically, as long as his bed is cleared off and he has access to a computer and internet/telephone he’ll probably be happy enough with his re-purposed bedroom (now my computer research workstation and HBA stockpile room)

    I don’t sleep too much to begin with (average 5.5 to 6 hours per night) and I am my own worst critic when it comes to how clean my house is or how straightened my cupboards.

    I’m taking some of your advice here and taking a nap in a few minutes. Then probably out to lunch or something. The, if the mood strikes I’ll get back to the organizing task.

    Have a good rest, Donna. You deserve it.
    Take a nap too!…

  23. Also Donna, if you haven’t done it lately, have your thyroid checked. Please.

    • Donna Freedman

      @Sam: I’m already on thyroid meds and the last blood work looked good. But I’m glad you brought it up, because a fair number of people have bum thyroids and don’t know it.

  24. priskill

    Aww, please take care and find opps to rejuvenate! It sounds as though you are already taking steps in that direction — good for you. On the one hand, how GREAT to have so many writing opportunities winging your way — a plethora of possibilities! But — tears on the keyboard, no, no, no!!! Writing is your great love, right? And you’ve worked so hard to get here — you’ve earned the right to dial back a bit. With some time and R&R, you will so regain your joie de ecrire. In fact, Alaska may really offer a chance to relax (enough to get to that Talkeetna do, at least) and have some fun with friends and loved ones. Make sure you factor in “Donna” time — whatever that looks like. For me, it’s Iced Coffee on the Starbucks patio (not frugal), the paper/silly magazine/novel and my very own smuggled in frugal snack. This weekend ritual works wonders! For $2.85 (reusable cup discount), I recharge and get ready to slay dragons.

    Sorry — don’t mean to blather in platitudes, but what you feel is real, and it’s really okay to give yourself a break. Good luck — your articles always make me laugh out loud and you send so much good cheer into the world — right back at you, Donna!

  25. I was going to suggest exactly the same thing as Sam….get your thyroid checked! I have had terrible bouts of exhaustion at different times in my life related to my thyroid, and I think that things like fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome, although not exactly the same as hypothryroidism, kind of come out of the same auto-immune disease pot! Just make sure you see your doctor to rule everything out, because we really do want to see you back soon, rested and refreshed!

    • Donna Freedman

      @Susan: At the same time as I had the thyroid trouble I also had a serious Vitamin D deficiency. These occurred during a quarter with some of the most challenging reading of my return-to-college career, and the quarter before my daughter got married (lots of planning/stress). I was crawling through the days. Liz Weston told me to get my thyroid checked. Yep — and the D-ficiency to boot.
      Sad to say: At the time I thought it was a failure of will. Sigh.

  26. I have to protect my energy since being diagnosed with hypothyroidism. Despite the medication being at a therapeutic level, I wear out easier. That might be what’s happening to you.

    But then there’s the fact that we’re not 25 anymore. Take care of yourself first-most and the rest will fall into place.

  27. Listen to what your body tells you–I know that sounds all homeopathic and new age–but IT IS TRUE. If you need a break you need a break–and take it! All of us here in the ether know you’ll be back better than ever after you have rested for a while…
    Feel better!
    S.R.

  28. I have a tip on how to say NO: look at a toddler. I have a niece that is two years old and the only real word she says, and means, is NO. Every cellule of her little body becomes a big NO when she says it. I’m learning from her.

  29. lostAnnfound

    I feel like I’m in the same spot…burning the candle at both ends and in the middle. Working full time (I try not to complain about that because many are without jobs), two teens and their assorted activities/daily needs/wants, husband, house, etc. can takes its toll on occasion.

    Please take a break and get some rest, Donna! We need to remember to put ourselves first at times. We have to learn to say “NO” for our own good.

    And if you ever learn how to sing Row, Row, Row Your Boat in Latin, please post the lyrics here! :)

  30. Hootieman

    Donna, 40 minutes is just a few winks. I guess I need to write you a little article on the art of taking naps. Do not set the alarm. Shut down your mind, and just drift off into luxury. I took three naps today. I’ve been burning the candle in 4 spots at once. So, one nap was 2 hrs. Two naps were over 3 hours each. Delicious.

    • Donna Freedman

      @Hootieman: Oh, sometimes I sleep longer. But even though I set the alarm for 60 to 75 minutes, I generally wake up within 40. It works for me.

  31. We should all be on your e-mail lists. Just let us know the other articles you write (the ones you can’t get out of) and we’ll keep up with you that way. Like everyone else has said, we’ll be here when you get back from a much-deserved break.

    • Donna Freedman

      @Karla: I hope not to disappear entirely! Just wanted everyone to know that I’m not at the top of my game.
      Thanks to all who have commented. It’s lifted my spirits considerably.

  32. Donna…..perhaps you are struggling with a bit of post traumatic stress syndrome after being mugged? People do not understand how debilitating that can be to our whole well-being. Shock can send your body into a constant “fight or flight” response, even if you are not consciously aware of it. Rest, rest, rest, and then rest some more. My prayers are with you!

    • Donna Freedman

      @Gail: It’s possible. Part of me thinks that the mugging was a wake-up call of some sort. Even though I wasn’t injured per se I have felt different since it happened. Shocked off my treadmill, perhaps?
      Thanks for your concern.

  33. You might consider seeing a doctor.
    I understand that you feel your tiredness is causational, however please do not rule out medical issues as a primary source, to which all of your activities are only secondary contributors.

  34. Donna, yes, I’ve been there. I had to learn (and still sometimes have to remind myself) to set boundaries and sometimes do things like go to bed early and really consider if every activity or opportunity is a good idea. When it all looks great, it can be hard to choose, but being judicious about how you spend your time can help a lot.

    And to echo what others have said–take care of yourself first! I enjoy reading you here and on MSN and would hate to see you burn out.

  35. Worship, walk, sleep, breathe deeply, heal and love.

  36. Hootieman

    Add laughter to the mix. The reason I posted the row row row your boat was it helps to remember silly things from childhood. Sorry, I can’t teach you how to make armpit noises. You will have to learn that one yourself.
    One time, my bro and I got my dad’s coveralls out of his closet. We put them on, his old shoes, and old hats. We got every pillow in the house, and stuffed the front/back of the overalls. We went outside looking like two little old round men. :)

  37. ImJuniperNow

    Donna – Doesn’t it feel dirty to say “no”?

    With the passing of my mother this summer I’m no longer obligated to assist in ALL the family holidays at her house.

    NO Thanksgiving (a small group of us are having our meal prepared and delivered by a local supermarket).

    NO Christmas (again, a small group, maybe going to that Great Wolf waterslide place in PA!).

    NO Christmas presents except to those people I REALLY want to (Heifer Int’l is getting my Christmas Club).

    I’ll just say “NO” if the rest of you will.

    • Donna Freedman

      @ImJuniperNow: NO! I won’t say no! ;-)
      I like Heifer International, too. If I ever come into real money I’d love to give water buffaloes to everyone on my list.

  38. It took me a very long time before I could be okay with sleeping at times other than 10pm to 6am. I really had to work at giving myself permission to nap when I needed it, and to go to sleep at 8pm if I really feel like my energies are flagging.

    You mention that you will take a couple of months off when you get back from Alaska. Please do not wait that long to rest and recoup. Rest while you are there. You are going to be there for some of November, all of December, and some of January. Sounds like the perfect time (and ideal weather) to stay cozy inside, take warm bubblebaths, read books that have nothing to do with personal finance, and drink (insert name of ideal relaxing drink here) to your heart’s content!

  39. Hi Donna, reading this post I thought that I could have written it. I feel almost the same at the moment and I have been living a busy life in the last…well, lost count how many years, really. Interestingly, I am not sure how productive I have been – a bit probably. More importantly, I no longre have a problem with my work-life balance – work has become my life.

    Have been thinking that something has got to give; I am currently on sabbatical so may be I’ll have some rest as well.

    Look after yourself and keep writing – even what you probably don’t consider ‘good work’ is very good. If the similarities between us don’t end with the accumulated tiredness, you are likely to be one of the ‘under performing over achievers’ – a fancy way to say that you are your own ‘slave driver’, you have extreemly high standards and you self exploit. Letal combination!

  40. You just need a drink and a nap. I can help with the drink.

  41. Madeline

    Just found your blog–it”s great! However! As a womens health care nurse (retired now) I think you need to pay attention to your exhaustion and desire to stay home. I read about your ASSAULT in Washington and i do believe you have some post traumatic stress stuff going on! I hope you can find some support and a way to de-stress.. it can snowball if you are not careful– your exhaustion and desire to withdrawal are signs that you need some help to process this awful event!! What a terrible thing to have to experience!!!!

    I’ll keep reading and see how things progress.. thanks for sharing!!

    • Donna Freedman

      @Madeline: Thanks for your concern. If things don’t improve I’ll definitely see my physician. My annual is due next month anyway.

  42. All that “can’t remember things”, “bumping into stuff” and restlessness is actually your body burning a fuse in order to prevent a catastrophic overload. Please take care of yourself, take a break, recharge and rest assured that your readers are loyal and will still be coming to your blog when you are ready to start again.

  43. I totally understand the fact that you want to take a break. You definitely deserve a chance to relax and recharge. I find it hard to admit fatigue too, because I always have so many things to do; even when I’m working on one thing, I feel like I should be working on something else. And then I start feeling overwhelmed and angry about everything, especially the little things. That’s when I take a break and treat myself in small ways; I’ll read a good book or take a nap. You should treat yourself too.

  44. I feel like that all the time. Thought it was normal.

  45. “You’re only human, and not superman. I think you’ve been saying yes too often, because you thought you could do all of this. You can do a lot, sure, but there are limits. Respecting them is respecting yourself. Give yourself a break, literally…”

    This is what I have to tell myself sometimes…

  46. Liz McKay

    thanks for posting about this. It’s been helpful to me to read all this great advice, all this “permission” to take care of ourselves. Hope you’re feeling better soon.

  47. As my sister in law recently reminded me (when I told her I was in charge of four church committes while going to school full time and running a quilting business)

    NO.

    Is a complete sentence.

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