Want to survive “Blue Monday”? Maybe a Chicken Chucker would help.Posted by Donna Freedman on Jan 6, 2012 | 121 comments
Each year a mid-January day is designated “Blue Monday” — allegedly the most depressing day out of the 365 or 366, according to a formula concocted by a guy named Cliff Arnall.
A former tutor at the University of Cardiff, Arnall seems to have created Blue Monday as a publicity stunt for a travel agency. Still, the reasoning seems pretty sound to me: A combination of consumer debt from holiday spending, post-holiday letdown, crappy weather and failed New Year’s resolutions make us feel like hell.
The big day this year is Monday, Jan. 16. And this week’s giveaway is a medium-sized box o’ weird designed to cheer you up, or at least to distract you until Tuesday, Jan. 17.
The box contains:
Survival Chocolate. Well, how are you going to survive Blue Monday without some dark chocolate (55% cocoa) from Bloomsberry & Co.? Or put it in the freezer for a month and give it to your sweetheart on Valentine’s Day.
“I Am America (And So Can You!).” This book by non-con Stephen Colbert is hilarious. Laughter is the best medicine – after dark chocolate, that is.
Two books by Jeff Yeager. Frugal can be funny! “The Cheapskate Next Door” and “The Ultimate Cheapskate’s Road Map to True Riches” will surely combat the blues. Extra cheapskate points if you’re careful not to break the spines so that you can re-gift, sell or trade them. (Hint: If you plan to do that, don’t eat the chocolate while reading the books.)
Stress ball. It’s blaze orange and bears the logo of Cozi.com – loot from one of the conferences I attended this year. Should Blue Monday press your rage button, squeeze the ball rather than a co-worker’s neck.
Two toys from Happy Meals. One is from “Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked” and the other is a Power Rangers Samurai. Play with them when your supervisor isn’t looking.
Stainless steel water bottle. Water. Yes. Water! That’s the clear beverage I’m sipping! (Alternate scenarios: iced tea, POM, orange juice.) The bottle bears the logos of Microsoft and the University of Washington, if such things matter to you.
A Hello Kitty clip. “It’s for clipping things,” my 5-year-old nephew explained gravely. I double-dog-dare you to use it to clip together reports, to see if your boss is paying attention.
A funny self-stick note pad. These sticky notes from Oatmeal Studios say, “I’m not living in denial…I’m just visiting.” If your boss liked the Hello Kitty clip, he or she will love the sticky notes.
A Chicken Chucker. Now how can you be glum when you have the chance to slingshot little plastic fowls around the room? You also have the opportunity to quip, “Look! Poultry in motion!” Lots of fun at work, guaranteed.
Magnetic poetry kit. This time it really is poetry, or at least the makings of it: a small Ziploc bag filled with all sorts of magnetized words. It’s designed for the refrigerator, but you might want to avoid that particular appliance due to the “eat until you can’t walk” aspect of Seasonal Affective Disorder. Instead, I suggest you invite a couple of friends over for a poetry contest – done on the coffee table, to keep you away from the fridge. Here’s what I came up with in just a few minutes:
She was one wet turtle girl, saying
“Love is the music of mud.
“Imagine if magic came silently and fed upon dreams.
“But I cocoon in a bouncy castle.”
That’s deep, man. So deep that it made me want to raid the fridge.
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The deadline is 9 p.m. PST Monday, Jan. 9. That gives me a week to get the prize to the winner. The rest of you will have to seek your own solace, whether that’s chocolate or chicken. Or both.