Minor celebrityhood: What’s YOUR dubious claim to fame?Posted by Donna Freedman on May 24, 2010 | 39 comments
I miss the Fly By Night Club, a proudly sleazy Alaskan bar that served up Spam and satire in equal doses. Nine months a year the club presented “The Whale Fat Follies,” a musical revue that skewered local and national politics, Martha Stewart, wildlife management policies, the Neiman-Marcus catalog, the official state fossil (that’s the woolly mammoth, not Sen. Ted Stevens), money-grubbing evangelical ministers, opera, squid, Bill Clinton and just about anything else that club owner Mr. Whitekeys figured could get a laugh.
The slide shows usually included at least one naked backside. The male cast members enjoyed the cross-dressing skits just a little too much. Some shows featured the world’s first tap-dancing outhouse, a performer introduced as “the happy tapper in the snappy crapper.”
Hey, this was Alaska: We had to make our own fun.
One of my favorite bits was “Minor Celebrities,” which invited audience members to submit their most tenuous brushes with fame – the more bizarre, the better. You’d hear stuff like “My father ran over Michael Landon’s cat,” “I stole some gravel from Paul Newman’s driveway” or “My best friend’s step-brother’s next-door neighbor’s swimming coach’s son was William Shatner’s gardener’s daughter’s best friend.”
Naturally there was a book in this, a compilation called “Elvis Presley’s Pharmacist Was My Sunday School Teacher.”
Share your story and win a prize
So tell me: What’s your most freakish brush with fame?
It needs to be a brush, mind you. I’m not interested in actual accomplishments, especially if they’re dignified.
Maybe you’re embarrassed to admit certain, uh, indiscretions involving underage drinking or gravel theft. That’s OK: Your full name need not be used if privacy (or a statute of limitations) is a concern.
And of course there’s a prize: The best worst story wins a copy of “Elvis Presley’s Pharmacist Was My Sunday School Teacher.” Maybe some chocolate, too.
Xena, Yahoo and Uma Thurman
To enter, leave a comment with your minor celebrity tale. Use a pseudonym if you like. I’ll wait a couple of weeks before announcing a winner.
And to get the ball rolling, here are a few of my own dubious distinctions:
- I served Thanksgiving dinner in a trailer in Alaska to the man who invented “Xena, Warrior Princess.” (Do you think it was the way I carved the turkey…?)
- My ex-husband’s sister’s boyfriend is in a band with the guy who did the yodel for “Yahoo.”
- I held hands with the Rev. Jesse Jackson and Sen. Jesse Jackson Jr. in the same night.
- My sister’s husband’s brother’s wife got turned into stone by Uma Thurman in the movie “Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief.”
- I was in a shotgun tournament with Sarah Palin.
Come on, folks: Surely you can top those. And I hope you’ll try. Otherwise I’ll be stuck with this copy of “Elvis Presley’s Pharmacist Was My Sunday School Teacher.”