My blogging buddy and former* Get Rich Slowly boss J.D. Roth recently posted an article called “How to find purpose in your life: 12 powerful exercises to help you discover purpose and passion.”
Among those exercises was one called “20 things you like to do,” which is just what it sounds like: Make a list of 20 things – and it must be 20 – that you like to do.
With those items you’re supposed to create a chart with columns like “when did you last do this thing,” “is it free or is there a monetary cost,” “solitary or social,” “planned or spontaneous” and several other descriptors.
J.D. admits he could list only 16 things he likes to do. Even better: “Playing computer games” was the first one he thought of, whereas “sex” was the second thing to come up (as it were).
Not only does he admit it (not sure I would have!), J.D. pokes fun at himself before the readers had a chance: “Kind of sad (and hilarious) to note that this list is in the order I thought of things.”
I decided to bounce off his post and give a list of 20 things I like to do. Trouble is, I couldn’t make it to 20 things either. Maybe that means my tastes are refined, or maybe it means that I’m a pretty boring person.
Note: These are in no particular order. In fact, one of the most important things I like to do is found at the end.
1. Sex
Sorry, J.D., but that was the first thing that came to mind. Sorry, too, to any squeamish readers. Love doesn’t always equate a correspondingly rich physical life (shout-out to the ace folks among us), but I’m here to report that intimate connection doesn’t have to end after 35, or even after 55.
2. Spending time with DF
Whatever we’re doing – housework, a symphony concert, grocery shopping, gardening, poking around the library – it’s all wonderful because we’re doing it together. Many a winter evening is spent just reading in adjoining armchairs. Bliss.
3. Reading
In an armchair next to DF, at the kitchen table, while sitting on a plane – I can’t seem to get enough words. Fiction and nonfiction, biography and memoir, comedy and tragedy: Once again, bliss.
4. Writing
I do this for a living, and to be honest it isn’t always fun. Some days I’d rather mop the floor than do my job. But I still can’t think of a better way to earn my bread and butter.
5. Blogging
I list this separately from “writing” because technically I don’t have to maintain a personal blog. Sure, it’s a good way to promote my books and drive readers to my freelance articles, but I could also have done just a promo page with links to my work.
When I started writing this blog going on eight (!) years ago, it was as my playground for words. Still is.
6. Coaching
I’ve been a writing coach for several years now and I really, really enjoy it. Helping someone figure out what’s preventing him from telling the story (fiction or nonfiction) he wants to tell is extremely satisfying. As it says on my business card: I’ll help you find your voice.
7. Puns!
I’m an inveterate** punster and I don’t want to be cured of this groan-inducing habit. Fortunately, DF is also a master of the lowest form of humor.
8. Walking
I’ve still been going around in circles for much of the year. At the suggestion of my daughter, I recently added a “fitness walking” YouTube video to my day. Right now it’s a 15-minute routine with a super-perky woman leading the charge. While I am always glad to have exercised, I am cranky throughout this video. Some day I will work up to longer videos, with correspondingly longer cranky spells.
9. Saving money
I like writing about it, because it helps other people get control of their own cash. But even if I didn’t have this job I’d still work to get the most bang for the buck. I earned that money and I expect every dollar to work for me – and to work hard.
10. Public speaking
Which I actually sort of dislike, i.e., I get really nervous just before a talk. But once I get going, whether it’s at the Financial Blogger Conference or at the local NerdNite, it’s both fun and satisfying because I’m sharing info that helps people. I especially like it when people ask questions or offer suggestions.
11. Travel
Most of it is to see family and friends. That’s one of the reasons Alaskans travel a lot. (The other is that we want to escape lousy weather.) Naturally I use frugal travel hacks whenever possible, to stretch those wanderlust bucks. The only downside is that every day I spend with family and friends Outside*** is a day I don’t get to spend with DF. Sigh.
12. Cooking
I prefer cooking when there’s someone else in the house, because cooking just for myself often seems like a chore (and a bore). So if DF is off skiing or otherwise engaged, I’ll often have a sandwich or crackers and cheese and fruit.
But other times I catch myself shorting myself, and realize that I should give the same care to my own meals as I do to feeding others. Then I’ll fix a true repast, which I eat at the table with a cloth napkin and the classical music station playing softly.
When DF and I cook together, it’s always a true repast – because, as he says, the food is “prepared and shared with love.” Yep.
13. Cleaning
As with exercise, I like to have cleaned. Usually my tidying and scrubbing is done with an eye toward efficiency. But every so often when I have time to focus on a task, it’s satisfying to achieve.
Usually it’s something that isn’t a daily chore, such as cleaning the bathroom counter and its two sinks. It looks so nice when I’m finished that I think, “How come we don’t clean this thing more often?” And then DF and I promptly ignore it for another couple of weeks.
14. Gardening
Full disclosure: DF does more of this work than I do. But that’s okay with me because (a) he’s retired now and (b) it’s his property. But I do love, love, love to transplant strawberries, prune tomato plants, pick salad greens, tie up pea vines and the like. I also love preserving the results.
15. Spending time with people
With DF, obviously, but also time with my dad, siblings, daughter, niece and nephews, friends and DF’s granddaughters. The older I get, the more important I realize this time can be.
What’s infuriating is that the older I get, the less energy I have to be able to balance all the things I need to do with all the things I want to do. And since most of my relatives and some of my friends live Outside, that means many additional hours (and additional bucks) are needed to visit.
Not sure what the answer is, although winning the Mega Millions might help.
Readers: While I don’t expect you to list 20 in the comments, how about sharing some of the things that make you happy?
*For those who don’t know, J.D. bought back Get Rich Slowly recently and he wants to be my boss again. That is, when he’s gotten the business built back up to where it’s consistently earning he plans to hire back some writers – including me. To that end, please go read his site every day.
**My friend Linda B. once gave me a button that said something like, “Invertebrate punster: Spinelessly unable to resist wordplay – so slug me!” You can see why we’re friends.
***That’s the word Alaskans use for anyplace that isn’t Alaska. See also “the Lower 48” and “the States.”
Related reading:
- My first half-million
- In which I cop to some odd habits
- A satisfied life
- Time is something we can’t do over
Spending time with family and friends.
Finding ways to save more money while maximizing my benefit.
Reading.
Traveling.
Researching areas of interest to me.
Saving money.
Walking.
Eating.
Spending time with animals.
Archery.
Not sure if I can get to 20 tho…
Spending time with my husband
My dogs
My needlework
Exercising
Reading
Okay:
*sex/intimacy
*cooking
*sewing
*dehydrating/canning food
*reading
*teaching/tutoring
*needlepoint, crochet
*upholstery
*writing short stories
*learning new things everyday
*attending school (different learning)
*attending theatre, art openings
*going to free events– lunches, dinners, craft shows, festivals
*finding cheaper or free to obtain what I need (curb/dumpster sometimes)
*container gardening–food and flowers
*finding free sources of produce from farmers, gleaning
*cleaning
*organizing
*blogging
*photography although amateurish
*design
*exercising, biking for fun
*board games
21!
sex
read
spend time outdoors
hang out with husband
pet on cats
hang out with my kids
listen to music
cook for people
bake
shop for bargains online
shop for produce
coloring in doodles or coloring books
hand stitching
taking care of people
gardening
eating
writing postcards or letters
laughing
reminiscing with friends
walking barefoot on the beach
traveling
Let’s see how many I can come up with:
1. Sex/intimacy
2. Relaxing after work with my husband.
3. Relaxing in my hot tub on my deck (new!)
4. Traveling
5. Volunteering
6. Walking and playing with our silly dog
7. Spending time with friends and family
8. Reading blogs/commenting
9. Gentle yoga
10. Exploring my new area (recently moved house)
11. Crafts
12. Reading
13. Managing our budget
14. Preparing for retirement!
15. Making friends in my new home town.
😀 Nice post!! My list would be “Like she said, only delete that cleaning noise.”
Love your list. I don’t have a list of my own, but would you be willing to share the YouTube walking video you use?
Thanks! Beverley
P.S. I hope JD hires you very, very quickly!
Here it is:
If you can stand the relentlessly chipper attitude and the less-than-superb music (which, to be fair, is there just to provide a walking beat), I think you’ll find the workout useful. While visiting Abby I observed her doing one of the longer ones — with weights! Argh. Some day I’ll get there, although I may shine on the hand and ankle encumbrances.
And yeah, I hope J.D. does well enough to hire me back by the end of the year. I used to enjoy writing for GRS because he let me do whatever I wanted.
1. Sex/intimacy
2. Reading books
3. Reading my favorite blogs (such as yours!)
4. Spending time with friends and family.
5. Hugging kids and husband
6. Obsessively planning our next great travel adventure.
7. Travel-lots!
8. Cooking
9. Going to the movies
10. Sitting by a warm fire in the winter.
11. Snuggling with our black lab.
12. Going to the beach.
13. Hiking-can’t seem to fit this in due to work demands-does once a year count?
14. Listening to music.
15, Catching up with friends by phone (which seems to be a dying art).
16. Walkin on the treadmill after I roll out of bed-so why am I still so flabby?
17. Wine tasting or trying out a new craft beer location.
18. Long walks on a sunny day.
19. Harvesting the goodies from the Earth boxes on our deck.
20. Researching new recipes (and restaurants)to try.
And I forgot one-my husband and I trying to out-frugal each other.
I approve this competition!
In no particular order:
1) Sleeping
2) Reading “real books”
3) Reading PF blogs
4) Reading magazines
5) Sex
6) Having the house to myself
7) Eating, especially ice cream
8) Weightlifting
9) Running
10) Zumba
11) Yoga
12) Scoring freebies, especially free food
13) Combining sales, coupons, & rebates
14) Traveling to somewhere I’ve never been
15) Working on my budget spreadsheet
16) Time with my girlfriends
17) Date days with my husband
18) Lazy days at him with my kids
19) Sit on my deck on a warm, sunny day
20) Lying on a hammock
21) Being alone
22) Listen to podcasts
23) Get massages
24) Try new restaurants
25) Challenge myself physically – currently trying conquer headstands & handstands, and may do more Spartan Race this year
26) Keep up with my fitness & frugal related friends on Instagram
18 should read “at home”
I also love surprising people (,gifts, outing, treats) and being surprised. I will never, ever try to find out what my gifts are.
Can’t think why I left “massages” off my list….! And having seen your home, I can understand why “sit on my deck on a warm, sunny day” is a thing for you.
sex
spending time with my kids
friends
reading PF blogs
podcasts
going to the beach
reading books
talking on the phone
going out to eat
sleeping
coffee
getting a massage
crossword puzzles or watching wheel of fortune, jeopardy and family feud
My date days with my boyfriend where its just 2 of us focusing on each other and having a really good time
1. Intimacy
2. Listening to people
3. Time with my husband and daughter
4. Star Trek DS9 (best written), TNG (Patrick Stewart), Voy Capt. Catherine Janeway, Discovery, TOS (Spock), Animated, Enterprise, Movies- I love the future it portrays
5. Reading science, ancient history, genome and space news and discoveries
6. Sewing with a needle and thread not a machine
7. Disney family vacations
8. Going out to dinner
9. Going out to breakfast
10. Bread
11. splashing in puddles during summer rain
12. frugal DIY hacks
13. solving puzzles, math problems
14. good decaf coffee
15. walking
16. making pie
17. cleaning especially detailed with a toothbrush cleaning
18. swimming/snorkling in tropical warm blue water
19. listening to music rock, classical, choral
20. singing
I have a six degrees of separation with “Enterprise”: My sister’s husband’s brother played Dr. Phlox.
OMG you know and are a relative of a STAR TREK “star”!!!
I am! Sorta. I’ve met John only a couple of times. But I admire him because he’s made a steady living in television and film, after starting out in theater (which fed his soul but couldn’t pay the bills).
Running
Biking
Walking (outdoors)
Reading
Watching Sci Fi Saturday night on MeTV (an entire evening of old school/geek shows, and one black and white “horror” movie hosted by Svengoolie! (Think 60’s Batman, Star Trek, 70’s Wonder Woman reruns – with Bela Legosi snug in the middle 🙂 )
Travel
Any time spent with friends
Baking
Thrifting
Being outside – I DO live in the Sunshine State after all!
1. Working on projects with my husband
2. Jazzercise
3. Evenings spent reading
4. My MGB
5. Taking our travel trailer on an adventure
6. Days when our small business hits one out of the park
7. Disney vacations
8. Baking bread
9. Christmas lights
Hmmm, not doing too bad. I didn’t figure I’d get that many:)
Fun! Let’s see if I can come up with 20:
1. Sex (this is a “gimme” since everyone above has brought it to mind!)
2. Reading books.
3. Surfing online (including especially frugal living and planning for retirement blogs).
4. Cooking for family/friends.
5. Thrifting.
6. Running with friends.
6. Hiking.
7. Walking my little dog.
8. Grocery shopping (call me weird but I enjoy it).
9. Spending time at the beach with family (family vacation home).
10. Doing yoga.
11. Taking trips.
12. Planning trips.
13. Watching Netflix/Amazon Prime in bed on IPad.
14. Going to the library.
15. Going to movies.
16. Going to Farmer’s Market.
17. Watching my kids play sports.
18. Working.
19. Attending 12 Step meetings.
20. Getting massages!
1.Bread
2.More bread
3.Bread again
4.Seriously,i love bread
5.I have an addiction basically
6.And i musn’t forget bread