Recently I announced my intention to borrow a strategy from The Frugal Girl, who posts a regular feature called “Meet a Reader.” This seemed like a natural fit for my site, since (a) I like talking with readers and (b) you guys are always talking to one another in the comments.
(Love it when that happens, by the way. And long may it continue!)
So I asked who might be interested in participating* in this feature, and was delighted that a dozen people either volunteered, or suggested a reader they hoped I’d interview. In addition, I made my own list (there was some overlap).
Random number generator decided that Cheryl would be first. Some of you may remember her from a previous piece I wrote, “Cheryl paid off her mortgage.” I was fortunate to meet her in person when visiting my dad, and figured a phone conversation would be as stimulating as the one the three of us had in person at a Dunkin Donuts in Tarpon Springs, Florida.
It was.
Here, edited a bit for brevity and clarity, is how it all shook down.
Background: Cheryl, 57, has been an import logistics coordinator for 28 years. It earns her a comfortably middle-class salary. She lives in a two-bedroom, two-bathroom condo in northweast Pinellas County, and is owned by a cat named Penny (appropriate). Cheryl likes to travel, run, ride her bike, read (she’s a “one-mile walk from the library”) and watch old-school horror movies (think “Frankenstein” and “Dracula”). She cheerfully admits she is a comic book nerd (photo at top left checks out!) who has not only attended comic book conventions, but also attended a concert by Lynda Carter (the original “Wonder Woman”) while at one such convention. #NerdAlert
What got you interested in money?
My mom got sick with pancreatic cancer in 2008 and she died within nine months. My sisters decided that I should handle the finances. It was a very eye-opening experience to me. I found out more money was going out than was coming in. It was very upsetting.
I remember sitting on the floor, going through these credit card bills… I had a breakdown in this room. I thought, ‘Oh my God, I’ve got to take control of my bills. I’m not going to have somebody in my house having a breakdown over my bills.”
I went home. I made a spreadsheet. I went to the Dave Ramsey deal that was being offered at my local church. Started snowballing and paid off my debt.
From that point, I didn’t follow anyone’s program. It just became second nature to me. It became natural.
Do you call it “frugality”?
I call it being thrifty. I live a thrifty lifestyle. That’s what I tell people all the time. I’m not cheap. I’m thrifty. I spend mindfully so I can live better.
If something happened to my job, I’d be fine. The only reason I’m not done with my job today is that insurance is expensive. And I want to travel and do things, and for that you need money. I save probably more than 50% of my income: maxing the IRA, putting money into personal savings.
My financial adviser once told me he’s always amazed at how much I can save on my salary. I tell him I don’t need anything. I don’t like to spend money. I look at something new and think I might want to have it, but I can probably find it at a thrift store for a dollar.
What’s the “why” behind your habits?
I want to retire comfortably, and I want to be able to travel. I don’t want to have to worry about anything.
Describe your best frugal win(s).
Paying off my house was huge. That freed up a lot of money to help max out my IRA. And the sense of pride and accomplishment I had from that? I still have the letter from Wells Fargo, pinned up in my closet where I can look at it every day.
Is it easy to be frugal where you live?
The cost of living in Florida is lower, and I do have a plethora of grocery options. Publix, Aldi, Walmart…
When I need things, groceries or toiletries or things for the house, I cherry-pick the deals. It’s almost a game, trying to see how much money I can save.
Worst money mistake(s)?
Probably not saving when I was younger. I should have been saving when I started my first job. I would pay some rent, buy some food and then go have some fun. I wasn’t participating in a 401(k) until I was in my late 20s.
I was never taught to save, growing up. I didn’t have an emergency fund. If something had gone wrong, I’d have been screwed. And I had a bunch of credit card debt at that time.
I pretty much worked minimum wage jobs until my late 20s, and I was going to school at night from my mid-20s. I try to use that as a lesson: Don’t do it like I did. Do it this way.
I have one credit card now. I put everything on it and I pay it off every month. I use it for the travel points.
What do you splurge on?
Travel. I don’t really splurge, though, because I try to find the best deal. I’m going to (a comic convention) and paying extra to meet William Shatner.
Coffee. I go to my local Dunkin Donuts and buy their coffee to brew at home. And they have coupons, and I have their app.
Hair. I go to a salon once a month to get my hair done.
What splurges don’t interest you?
I don’t splurge on food or eating out. I don’t spend a lot of money on clothes or shoes or purses, or fancy makeups. I don’t care what kind of shampoo I have.
You see a $100 bill on the sidewalk, and…?
It goes in the found-money bank on my dresser. When I still had a mortgage, I put that found money toward the principal. Now at the end of the year I donate it, to a different cause every year. Wherever I feel there’s need, that’s where I give it.
Any frugal tip(s) to share?
Save anything with every paycheck. Even if it’s only a dollar, put it aside. Pay yourself first.
Buy used, when you can. Don’t buy a used mattress, but for other things. And if you can’t buy used, always ask for a discount. All they can say is “no.” And always Google a coupon.
(Cheryl replaced the flooring in her condo during the pandemic. She asked if she could get a discount for paying cash, and she got it. The same contractor re-did her windows, and gave her another discount for cash.)
I started doing what your daughter does, the “saved savings” thing. If I save a dollar at Publix on my grocery bill, it gets transferred. In a year, there was $150 in that account. All that little stuff adds up.
I have to say one final thing: It helps to have people around me who support my thrifty ways. They know at the end of the year I’m going to count up my found money, so they start a little pool: Let’s guess how much Cheryl finds! I have four or five close friends plus my sisters, and they want to hear about my thrifty wins.
I tell people there’s a fine line between cheap and thrifty. Being cheap is being stingy. Being thrifty is because there’s things I want to do. I don’t like people to call me cheap because it’s an unkind term. Thrifty, to me, is a game.
Thanks, Cheryl.
*My offer to make you relatively famous still stands: If you’d consider being interviewed, leave a note in the comments or drop me a line at SurvivingAndThriving (at) live (dot) com. For the ground rules, see “A chance to meet a reader.”
I can’t wait until it’s my turn to be interviewed!
I get the feeling many of the stories will have common threads. I am in agreement: HUGE difference between thrifty and cheap. Cheap/stingy are ugly word, lifestyles. Thrifty/frugal is smart/resourceful/empowering IMHO.
I agree! I think there will be many similarities.
Thank you Donna, always a pleasure to speak our thrifty language with you!!
Thank you, Cheryl, for telling your story.
Loved this post and can’t wait for more like it!
This was great! Thanks, Cheryl and Donna. It’s always interesting to see the similarities in frugal lifestyles and to glean new ideas from others. Looking forward to the next one.
So am I!
Great interview!
Does anyone have an ethical issue with the idea of of paying a contractor with cash if that means that the contractor isn’t going to report the earnings and pay taxes? I am not sure why they would take a discount for cash otherwise. I do find it interesting that people who generally wouldn’t consider cheating on their own taxes are OK with helping someone else cheat to save a buck.
I think they offer a discount for cash because they don’t have to pay the credit card upcharge. To suggest that Cheryl is knowingly helping someone “cheat to save a buck” is not cool.
Incidentally, when I get my discount for “cash” at the dentist, it means paying with a check.
Interesting (and VERY weird) anecdote relating to this.
A few years ago, I was consulting/interviewing with several surgeons regarding an elective procedure I was contemplating.
At one surgeon’s office, they said there was a discount if we paid in cash, which I assumed meant not paying with a credit card for the reasons you noted above, Donna. So I replied, “oh, so I would save if I paid with a check?” The receptionist responded, “no, the discount only applies if you pay with actual cash.”
I thought to myself “how in the world would I be able to get literally thousands in cash?” and then “what? Like the movies? Walk in with a duffel bag full of hundreds?” I thought it sounded really shady and joked with my husband that they were probably a front operation!
I know such discounts are typically for the reasons stated above, but this was too odd a tale not to share!
That does sound weird. It would be way too dangerous to carry a suitcase full of cash around in public. Additionally, without a canceled check you have no proof you paid.
I wanted to add another comment because I don’t want to sound overly harsh and I certainly am far from perfect. I enjoyed reading the post and I have much in common with Cheryl and we would probably get along great as we are the same age. I just find it interesting how often we do things that show that our morals change situationally rather than being deeply held core convictions. I remember hearing once that the root of the word integrity is integer, which means wholeness. The idea behind integrity is that we make the same right decision in all circumstances, whether we will be seen or not. Anyway, I have my share of inconsistencies as I am human. But I try to admit to them because I can’t change something until I realize it is a problem. What I find interesting is if you point out the inconsistencies in statements/beliefs of most bloggers, the comment will be immediately deleted.
I wondered too why a discount for cash. I didn’t think about the tax angle, I thought it was to avoid credit card use charges. In general I don’t think we’re responsible for what people do after we pay them.
Hi Process. This has gone on for years, long before most independent contractors (including construction, hair dressers, small business owners, etc) started accepting credit cards. Cash was preferable to a check as there is no proof of the amount paid. I actually don’t think most general contractors accept credit cards now. People can’t be held morally accountable for what they don’t know, but if someone knowingly asks for a discount that is given only because the other entity most likely won’t be paying the appropriate amount of income tax, I would think that asker is ethically complicit in a crime.
In my case, the dental practice offers a discount for cash because they don’t have to pay the credit card fee.
And paying with “cash” meant paying by check. I want proof that I paid. It’s possible to lose a receipt, but the bank will have a copy of my check if it ever came to that.
Accepting a credit card costs the contractor money, important fact to consider especially if it is a large amount. Not sure of the percentage, but it does add up.
Coincidentally, several restaurants I have visited recently have instituted a 3% add on to the bill if you use a card.
Yeah, my HVAC company charges 3% extra if I pay by credit card. So it’s basically the same as saying I’m getting a 3% discount by writing a check instead.
This interview was fun. I love how clear Cheryl is on her priorities. Yes to Shatner, no to makeup. And I really love having the friends and sisters who cheer on your frugal wins!
We should all have friends and family who cheer us on!
I would like to state that I ask for a cash discount to save myself, and the vendor, a few dollars — not to help anyone “cheat” on reporting earnings…it never even occurred to me that the contractor wouldn’t “report” the money. Most small businesses have to pay a credit card fee, so I’m saving them the fee while getting the discount. And, as Donna stated— they take checks as “cash” payment—and I always got a receipt, so there is a paper trail.
Thanks for clarifying, ma’am.
I appreciate the clarification as well. If you are talking about a 2 or 3% discount, that makes sense. But as an accountant, I can guarantee you that a lot of tax evasion occurs due to independent contractors being paid in cash and not reporting the full amount of income received.
Great interview Donna. Thanks for sharing, Cheryl. My fav line “I spend mindfully so I can live better”. A great mantra to live by.
Indeed it is.