Early this afternoon I had my camera-up-the-windward-passage exam. After having given up seedy foods for a week (including, alas, popcorn) and having spent a day and a half doing the not-fun (but not unbearable) prep, I am good for another five years.
I also have 11 little thumbnail photos of my colon’s various twists and turns. In color. Thanks, doc.
The release paperwork also instructed that for the next 12 hours I should not “perform any activity that requires you to be mentally alert with normal reflexes.” I figured that clears me for blogging.
Luckily for you I’m not inclined to post those colon candids. Can’t wait to show to my older nephew, though. When he asked why I couldn’t sample his mom’s fresh blueberry jam I told him about the test.
“Send us a picture,” he suggested.
(Apparently wiseguy-ism runs in the family.)
Most people get colonoscopies every 10 years, but due to a family history I get them every half-decade. When the final dose of MoviPrep looked a little nauseating this morning, I reminded myself that colon cancer treatment would be a lot less pleasant than sucking down a couple of liters of the cloying, slightly salty liquid.
So that’s the first reason: Because getting a colonoscopy might save your life. Colorectal cancers are the second leading cause of cancer-related death for men and women in the United States. But the good news, according to the American Cancer Society, is that the number of deaths has been dropping for more than 20 years, which is due at least in part to screenings.
Some people are afraid of the test, and I can’t blame them. The notion of a camera snaking up your backside is a little daunting. (These days there’s a corollary fear: that the footage might wind up on YouTube.)
A relatively simple procedure
As someone who gets these every five years (and at one point had two procedures in a three-year span due to worrisome-at-the-time findings), let me assure you: The test is generally neither painful nor debilitating.
You might need to take a day off for the prep, unless you work at home or you sit really close to the office bathrooms. (There’s a reason they call it MoviPrep. Another formulary, GoLYTELY, is not an example of truth in advertising.)
My dad has a practical suggestion for a successful prep: “Just don’t wear any pants that day.”
You’ll definitely need to take at least part of the day off when you have the procedure. Not that it takes a long time; mine lasted less than an hour, from changing into the gown to gratefully sipping the cup of water that DF brought into the recovery room. But the “conscious sedation” is likely to be a medication called Versed, which leaves you a bit loopy for, oh, 12 hours or so.
(Conscious sedation – I love that oxymoron.)
And that’s the second reason: the long, lovely, Versed-enhanced nap afterwards. Sleep comes like a caress. I didn’t lie down immediately – I wanted something to eat first – but then I slept for three hours and woke up only because DF came in to check on me.
Take charge of your health
Your mileage may vary. A relative had a difficult colonoscopy due to an unusual bend in her colon. (Also due to the fact that she’s a vegetarian and one of the mainstays of the prep diet is Jell-o. Vegan gelatin, she reports, is pretty ghastly.)
The doc tried using a child-sized scope and even then couldn’t manage to complete the test. Thus the relative had to come back again (which meant doing the prep again), and the second attempt wasn’t comfortable.
Again: Cancer treatment isn’t comfortable, either, and it takes a lot longer than a day and a half of inconvenient/slightly uncomfortable prep.
In my relative’s case the examination revealed the type of polyp that can turn into a particularly nasty form of colon cancer. She felt fortunate to be able to get the test, even if it meant doing the prep twice. At least the second time she saved a little money by skipping the vegan gelatin purchase.
So if you’re older than 50, talk to your healthcare provider about getting this test. If you’re younger than 50 but there’s a family history, please talk to your healthcare provider. What you don’t know can hurt you, and it’s up to you whether the footage winds up on YouTube. Just don’t decide while the Versed is still in your system.
More light reading:
- Never dumpster-dive for plastic containers. (Warning: Immature language.)
- Quarreling with blessings
- The life I once led
- Does frugality have to hurt?
Sorry to hear you have to go through this so often.
I remain suspicious: one of my colleagues almost died after a colonoscopy. Her intestine was perforated and she had about bled out by the time he family got her to the hospital.
Perforation is one of the possible go-wrongs; apparently it happens 1% of the time. Glad I wasn’t one of that elite group. Given my family’s history, I’ll chance it and hope for a doc with steady hands.
I forgot to mention the fact that DF went on the liquid diet with me. He said it wouldn’t feel right enjoying a real meal when all I could have was broth and Jell-O. Bless his heart.
Glad yours was relatively comfortable. I did not enjoy mine much. Got rapid heart beat from the prep (fortunately had some potassium in the cupboard), and the sedation made me vomit. When I have to do it again I will ask if I can skip the sedation, or if they have something that will agree better. I will also remember to take electrolytes with the prep. I’m wondering what a “virtual” colonoscopy is? May not be good for people with family history, but for the 10 year folks out there might be an option.
Yuck. Sounds pretty uncomfortable — although, again, so is chemo…. I wonder if a different prep would be easier for you? The last time I had one of these it was a solution so nasty that no amount of white grape juice could disguise the taste. I have to say that the MoviPrep isn’t so bad — not my first choice of a beverage, mind you, but not unbearable. (Especially if you have some iced tea and a hard candy nearby to take away the taste.)
Surely there’s another form of sedation. I agree: Talk to the doctor.
As someone who had been dealing with a strange set of unrelated symptoms for several months, a million tests, and finally a visit to a GI doctor who just happened to say to me on his way out the door “anything else of concern?” I decided to mention my less than successful potty visits of late and he said “Ok I can look at that while you are under for the EGD”
Thank God he asked and I answered. Turned out he found a polyp that due to type and size had a 75% likelyhood of being cancer. I was 34 at the time. No family history. I was the first. Now everyone in my family needs to get checked but many still don’t. They say they can’t take the time for the prep.
I tell people to always know what things look like in the toilet and always talk about changes in bathroom habits. Many people don’t realize that even if you beat colon cancer 90% of survivors develop liver cancer within 10 years. Those are rotten statistics.
Congrats on a good outcome.
I’m glad you spoke up when you did. And another close family member still hasn’t gone for the test even though he’s in his 50s now. Having gently nagged, we’re all hoping he’ll come to his senses.
The spouse has to go in every 2 years for this wonderful test. One of his parents died of primary colon cancer (metastasized to the breast and lung) and his last colonoscopy revealed precancerous polyps so this test really has saved his health and life. I go too for sh*ts and giggles (pardon the pun). The test isn’t so bad and I completely agree with you when you say that the treatment for cancer itself would be so much worse than the preventative maintenance. Glad you got the all clear!
Every two years? Okay, I’ll stop whining now.
Long family history of the disease here also. After emergency surgery due to hemoraging, I was diagnosed with colon cancer at age 47. State IV. Treatments is not fun. I ended up doing experimental treatment and it saved my life. However, it was not covered by my insurance. I decided to save my life and deal with the financial aftermath later. Still dealing with it.
I was on a 6 month colonscopy plan, then annual, then bi-annual and as of the one I had last summer, on the 5 year plan for the first time in my life.
I hate the prep, but love the sedation and the sleep afterwards.
That sounds harrowing. So glad that the treatment worked for you.
Thanks for reading, and for leaving a comment.
I hate to rain on your parade, Donna, but there IS another alternative to the MoviPrep. It’s a tablet that does exactly the same thing – which I didn’t know until after I dutifully drank my gallon, or whatever I could manage to swallow. A pharmacist at work told me about it – I wish I could remember the name, but I remember being royally ticked that I wasn’t prescribed the tablet form. Next time…..
Jessie: I do know about the tablet (it’s called OsmoPrep) and asked the medical center if I could use it instead. The policy there is to use a liquid prep because they say people don’t always get, um, prepped enough with the tablet.
This is the only place in Anchorage that accepts my insurance, so I said “OK, then.” Your mileage may vary.
Thanks for reading, and for leaving a comment.
I had my adventures in Colonland earlier this month as well. My prep consisted of 4 doses(days worth) of Ducolax, followed by 2 bottles of Gatorade laced with 2 WEEKS worth of doses of Miralax, but downed within a 15 hour span…..Yikes!
Nevertheless, everyone should have this done and there is nothing to be afraid of for the vast majority. I’d be more afraid to NOT have this test done.
“Conscious sedation”–I have met many individuals who go through their entire lives in this state….hehehe
I was on this same plan, and at least the taste of the Gatorade was tolerable. The prep wasn’t as bad as I feared. I now have to go back in 2 years due to a bad discovery.
The Gatorade has electrolytes (salt) so it will prevent the reaction that Susan above experienced.
Donna – excellent message! I hope it convinces anyone “on the fence” about getting the test done to pick up the phone and schedule it. I have had Crohn’s Disease for over 10 years which puts me at risk, and my grandmother had colon cancer which puts me at higher risk. For a long time I was on the every two years plan, but after 10 years with Crohn’s you get bumped up to the yearly plan. I am overdue so I’ll be scheduling mine today. Neither the prep are the test are comfortable, but it is truly a small price to pay. The peace of mind after a successful test is extraordinary.
Agreed! Upon finishing the final dose of MoviPrep I took great satisfaction both in pitching the container into the trash and thinking, “I don’t have to do this again for five more years!” Well, pending the test result — which turns out to be “five more years.” Yay.
Glad you’re getting the test done.
As a runner and punster, when the doctor told me after the colonoscopy that he pumped me full of gas and that I should refrain from rigorous exercise, my first thought was “Fart yes, fartlek no.”
Thanks for the frank and funny post on this topic, Donna. Glad that you got the all clear. Last time I did I did a colonscopy prep I also got rapid heartbeat… along with chills. I knew it was due to electrolyte imbalance but it still wasn’t fun. And I sure wish they would come up with a prep solution that isn’t so vile tasting. But as everyone has said… colon cancer treatment is whole lot worse!
No chills or rapid heartbeat for me, thank goodness… I was concerned about electrolytes so I drank most of a bottle of Powerade. The lemon-lime isn’t my flavor of choice, but it was medicinal. It occurs to me now (of course) that I could have drunk some of that Propel “fitness water,” which contains all the electrolytes of Gatorade but is clear vs. tinted. I had some of that when I was in Death Valley in the summer (yep, on purpose) and I remember thinking it was the most delicious stuff I’d ever tasted. Electrolyte imbalance may have had something to do with that, too.
Very good reasons and yes everyone should get a test because I would rather be inconvenienced then get cancer treatment as you say. I laughed reading this you are such a great writer.
Aw, thanks. With subjects like colonoscopies you have the option of laughing or whining. I, of course, opted for both. 😉
My doctor told me to have the endoscopy along with the colonoscopy. Because there is a huge pain that could be liver/gall bladder/pancreas, I just wanted to do the down-your-throat bit first. So, later I will have the colonscopy–like next month.
On my blog I talk about having the endoscopy and the problem I had. Endoscopy can detect Barrett’s esophagus. The esophagus becomes rigid, food won’t pass into the stomach, and a person can die from the cancer or from choking/suffocating with food stuck in esophagus. I have problems with gastric reflux (GERD), and I often get choked, like food will not enter my stomach. I throw up any liquid that goes down afterward. So, I had the endoscopy Tuesday.
http://practical-parsimony.blogspot.com/2013/08/three-year-old-swallows-gasoline-and.html
This test could save a life. I am told it is usually done at the same time as your test. Not me.
Thanks for the support of public health. Next time I will be taking up your excellent suggestion on Propel. The stuff I take to clean me out is some ginger/lemon tasting liquid that is mixed with water and the very thought of the stuff just makes me nauseated. However the second time, I took the doctor’s suggestion of mixing it with ginger-ale instead of water and it was so more tolerable.